Okay Ladies Now Let's Get Your Hoetation: "The Hoe Phase" & Sexual Liberation
Okay ladies now let's get your hoetation ✨lol I'm kidding but I bet that made your eyebrows go up like what !?
Nola's sexual liberation really makes a lot of people uncomfortable, particularly men. The "precious" double standard is yet again being challenged and that is when the labels like "hoe," and "freak" come out. Nola is in full control (well she tries to be) and practices safe sex but clearly for some it's too much to handle.
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Typically a Hoe phase for men is before they wanna commit they wanna get it out and for women it's after they've committed and given their all and feel they can't give their all anymore.
But in actuality a "hoe phase" is the fear or avoidance of and internal problem that one does not know how or want to deal with, so instead committing to deal with an issue someone going through a "hoe phase" is in search of quick fixes to fill a void. Hoe phase is definitely a result of PTS if you ask me. Getting your heart broken is stressful.
I know I've been talking about Nola all week, but Issa, my girl Issa touched on the topic of "Hoe Phase" after the presentation of her infamous and failed "Hoetation." Which is a rotation of her "hoes" (her option of men that she may or may not be sexually involved with.)
According to an interview with The Breakfast Club, Issa says that there are 3 types of hoe phases:
The women who don't partake in sexual activities with someone they are not committed to (which I would assume is a woman who just dates)
The women who society would consider to be "acting like a man," because she is fully enjoying sex without commitment with several people. These are the women who are subjected to the title of "hoe."
And then there are the women who are sexually active with several people but they are looking for more than just a fling. These seem to be the Nola's who may or may not want intimacy relationships with one of the men (or women) she is involved with, but she can't seem to find it in herself to commit because she may not be ready.
Often women in this category like Nola find qualities in all partners that she finds comforting, admirable and attractive but she cannot seem to find all of those qualities in one person, or she is a woman "working on herself" and has yet to come to terms with what is really going on within.
Regardless a woman's sexual liberation should not be judged by any man or woman, especially if she's not dealing with you and that is not your vagina. Nola is a fictional character to be dissected but for real life women mind your business.
Read more on Elite's take on Issa's Hoetation https://www.elitedaily.com/life/culture/issa-rae-insecure-hbo-season-2-hoe-phase/2020593